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Sure would you not have a small bit?

 

Ramp It Up/Stamp It Down: Friday, October 26th

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Posted October 26, 2012 by Will O'Keeffe in Ramp Specials

RAMP IT UP!

#nigellissima

While Ms. Lawson oozes and slathers her way around her kitchen in a silk dressing gown, bringing Italian food to life in excessive, adjective-heavy style on her new series Nigellissima (no, really), tweeters tweet  in an opinionated haze. There are those who object to the campery, to the middle-class preening and to the innuendo as our hostess licks every cooking utensil in sight. Then there are those who tweet about their rushed journeys home to see the show, comment as Nigella assembles dishes, keep count of euphemisms and, in some cases, simply state things they want to do to her. This communal viewing experience facilitated by social media is highly recommended.

Halloween costumes

America made her greatest contribution to modern life in the form of pop culture, and with it have come all-out innovative Halloween costumes. The streets will be lined with people in controversial, slutty, post-modern, existentially-fraught, bespoke or on trend costumes, leaving bouncers in no way clear as to what level of scum they may be admitting to their respective establishments. No more with the blackbags and rubber masks that make your face sweaty! Now is the era of dress-up.

Idris Elba rumours

So, Skyfall star Naomie Harris recently told the Huffington Post that Idris Elba, of The Wire and Luther fame, has met with Bond producers over the possibility of one day assuming the iconic role. We think the only appropriate reaction is: OMIGAWD OMIGAWD OMIGAWD!

 

 

STAMP IT DOWN!

Ireland being a ‘special case’

Brilliant. Ireland is now the Susan Boyle of the European village. Our fiscal administration is now gently tended to by the giants of Europe because we are a ‘special case’. Our leader must grovel to heads of state, looking for agreed wording on statements that will be ultimately meaningless in the budget to come, make no difference to our homeless or unemployed, distract from the dearth of reform, and fail to address the injustices in our country in any real way. Our politics has become a series of PR exercises. Enda Kenny is on the cover of Time, yet refuses to do live interviews with any broadcaster other than RTE, and somehow he can liaise with the leaders of nations with 10 times our population? ‘Special case’ indeed.

Christmas Party Planning

When it comes to Christmas parties, everyone has an opinion. Why, then, do 15 of 80 people reply to an email opening it up to a vote as to where the annual office bash is held? What does this signal – disinterest, nonchalance, inability to type or read? Sure, there’s silence now, but come the early weeks of December, there will be complaints aplenty from every sourpuss who looks like they’re posing for a mass card. How does one learn to tolerate people enough to want to spend a Christmas party with them, after the drivelling negativity we go through to get them to spend a few hours together to mark the birth of Santa?

Quinn Family Dance

It’s a sorry state we’re in when we pore over the fall of the mighty like torch-happy villagers banging at the door of Frankenstein’s castle.Why must the Irish Independent continue crawling down the tabloid toilet with their coverage of the Quinn family, branding it ‘Quinnasty’, and reporting on the cost of wedding cakes? The same quality of output continues with this ‘rap video’ from ‘people’, partly shot in Mountjoy Prison.

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About the Author

Will O'Keeffe

Will is a mild-mannered civil servant by day, Superman (fan) by night.

  • Sinéad

    On topic: I remain shocked that Lawson is in her 50s. She’s such a ride.

    Aside: I have wanted to call my first child Idris ever since that episode of Doctor Who when the TARDIS comes to life.

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